Tuesday, March 27, 2007

Screwing the anonymous

I think I need a thicker skin.

I had popped in a weblog I lurk at every once in a while and had posted a comment to a question the they had asked...a rather long, wordy and somewhat pointless post as I so often do. When I looked back today out of curiosity, the poster after me had insulted me and honestly, I must admit it made me feel stupid...and angry.

Why does this bother me?
I don't know, but it does.

There's something about the internet that makes it easier to be a prick to people you've never met. Maybe it's that I try to NOT be insulting to other people, when they've babbled on too much or are just offering a bit of advice. Perhaps I shouldn't have bothered to say anything in the first place, seeing as I don't know the blogger, and although she asked a question of people, who am I? Just a feen in Canada I suppose. I make a point of never posting anonymously so if someone has something to say to me or don't like what I've said, they can come and debate with me or tell me off if I'm being an ass. If I'm wrong I want to know - it's the only way to learn.

And honestly - in life and online, I try and not be an ass. I try and be positive, and pass on good vibes to kill the bad...for this exact very reason. A total stranger can make you feel irritable with a few simple and largely unthought words...and then it festers and you want to pass it on. Insults are not arguments...they are like a plague, and a gut response. Putting someone down to feel better is not what I want to do...I'd rather pass on the good stuff and watch it multiply.

It doesn't help that all this makes me feel small and petty that a part of me wants to go to the insulter's webblog and say "Who the f*ck do you think you are? Why are you insulting me- I don't even know you...and it isn't your blog anyway, so what do you care?" But really...what's the point? *sigh*

Because sadly, the person probably just thought I was blathering on like a 'tard and posted off the cuff, added their 2 cents like I did and never thought of it again. Suppose I should do the same...

And so to you rude blogger I say "Hope you have a great day!"
Me? I'm gonna have a cuppa, relax and go do something useful.

9 comments:

Unknown said...

That does suck. I'm sorry that happened, whereever it was. Perhaps you're right that you need thicker skin, but it's still a damn shame.
I think people should be careful what they post online. I mean be honest, but do it tactfully, so that people can understand the different facet of what your're saying. I myself still have to learn to be tactful. I don't get the sense you have that problem, Geosomin. You are too nice (hopefully that is not coming out like an insult, because it's not). You seem much more peaceful, from what I read, than myself, magnus, etc. Anyway, to get back to what I was saying, goodness knows how something could be used if you run for office (god forbid I ever do that) or apply for a job. Blog posts can come back and haunt us.

If only anonymous cowards' blog comment insults could be as dangerous to whoever those people are.

Anonymous said...

Of course there are different levels of anonymity....hey Gee? Wonder what Magnus makes of this discussion?

I've been ranting about this, actually, to a couple people in town. There's a new blog called citizensforabettertr.blogspot.com, which is basically a political soapbox to throw stones at town council. Great. Go for it. Except every one there is posting anonymously. Because they're scared, says one. Too bad, says I. If you can't stand behind what you say, then don't say it. Don't hide behind a veil of anonymity. You may perceive your position to be stronger, but in truth it is weaker.

Geosomin said...

I don't think that having an internet nickname is hiding or being anonymous...there are photos of me, my family and I've put my real name and where I live in occasionally. I have a thing about identity theft so I don't go on about it -I don't want to have any problems with work and things over a weblog...it happens sometimes. Anyone who has issues with me can find me and track me down and post back - that's the main thing. My issue was with the being rude to people period...if I'd used my real name on the post the guy would still have been rude to me. It's the same reason why I don't type J's full name out of respect for his privacy (ok it is quicker too...).

Besides, Geosomin now is like Baxter was...my nickname in parts of the world..all my web endeavors carry it. If anyone really wants to know my name they can ask... besides - you *know* my name...

(look up the number...:) )

Unknown said...

I agree. An online name is not anonymity.

When I speak of "anonymous cowards" I am referring to people who don't put any name period. A majority of people who write insulting or attacking things do not give any name. This has been the case with people who wrote nasty comments to my blog. If they write under a name, even under a pseudonym, then usually they will respond to my responses, so they are not cowards and they can be held accountable, somewhat.

A pseudonym plus an ISP is completely acceptable and brave enough. At least in my experience.

Anonymous said...

I tried looking up the number, but there were too many people with the same name, so I had to email...

I was being just a little facetious with that Magnus crack, but never you mind....

And don't you mean *you* know my name, as opposed to you *know* my name? Somehow the inflection on the latter reminds me of how Cook always used to walk up to me and say "I'm in trouble again." "Hmm?" "You *know* me, I...." and then launch into the latest scheme. And I would think to myself. "I *know* you in that I caught a ride down to Briercrest with you. I've known you for about two weeks here. But, since we are both from Tumbler Ridge, I guess there's some connection....

My point? Erm. Lovely weather we're having these days. Sun is shining, birds are singing. Oh, look, a bluejay....

Anonymous said...

Sometimes when someone says something sarky, it hurts a lot, but other times it's very easily shrugged off. An abusive email says more about the sender (anonymous or not) than it does about the recipient - that might be one reason why.

The anonymous ones (those admitting to no particular internet identity) are definitely cowards - I think of them in the context of 'an arrow in the back'! They're usually known as trolls.

(Now I'm imagining a troll crouching behind a rock, drawing a bow... and then the pitter patter of little trollish feet as it runs away).

Pacian said...

I sympathise. The insensitive will always hurt the sensitive and not give a damn about it.

Magnus said...

What were you responding to and how did you respond? You have me curious.

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