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Monday, August 25, 2008

Meh

I'm trying to respect our privacy while using this blog for what it is - my sounding board and place to vent anonymously to the world. It is hard.

So, I will be a bit vague from now on, out of respect. I am trying to find a middle ground between venting and letting out too much. It's not just me that is in this...
Right now I feel that in getting the help I need I've had to let some people know details...and now they know and can't "unknow" them...and so I've hurt those I love while trying to help them. If you know me...please respect those details. OK? This is my life here.
Still, I felt like I learned a great deal this weekend from my Dad and from getitng lost in my own head...sitting on the dock watching the sun fade and each star come out one by one until it was awash with stars. Shooting stars and satellites helped me focus...but it still isn't enough. I'm not able to fix things for anyone but me.
I can't win either way.
Frack.
I just have to hope that at the end of it all, what is to be will be...
I've figured out what I want "it" to be. But it's not up to me...

3 comments:

Pacian said...

Don't worry, I unknow things every day.

diddums said...

Me too... I wrote a couple of posts recently on my poor memory.

the Bag Lady said...

The Bag Lady has such a poor memory, it's difficult for her to function on a day-to-day basis!

Who are you, anyway?

How did I get here?

Have you seen my glasses...?