Warning: fruity post ahead

An ongoing discussion and point of musing in my mind over the past few days has been the comparisons of the ideas of prayer VS wishing VS positive thinking VS spells etc...
Having grown up in a well balanced and relatively sane/normal religious family, I understand the concepts of faith, prayer and the idea of trying to be a good person and praying for strengh and guidance. And my agnostic friends see such things as a crutch, but I wonder if something fills the needs in your soul and help you find direction, is that a bad thing? I don't want to go on a tirade about the endless problems I see in organised religion, especially with myself not sure where I stand with any/all of my beliefs and such at the moment...I'm on another thought train entirely right now.

You see, a friend of mine is a Wiccan. She's not fruity or new agey...she's a logical intelligent scientist with strong opinions, so I give her credit for having thought through things. And she doesn't have a strict belief thingy per se, but she does like the idea of being in touch with who you are, what you and those around you need and trying to live in a way that doesn't harm the world you live in. She also believes in the idea of spell casting...but not as an "I have the magic power to do this" concept. It's more of an attitude similar to prayer or meditation...and the more I think of it, the more I'm inclined to nod and say "go for it". After all, taking conscious actions to focus your thoughts and wishes on a particular thing (in this case the safety and well being of a family member in a time of stress) in the form of a ritual - is that anything different than a fervent prayer or keeping someone "in your thoughts"? Could it not accomplish the same thing? If you're declaring a thought or intention to the world out there...even if it only accomplishes nothing other than to make you feel better, is that a bad thing?

Now I must be clear and say that I balk at and have come to hate ideas like "The Secret" where you just have to want something badly enough and concentrate on it and it will come to you, cure you, etc. The idea of this kind where if it doesn't happen to you you just aren't trying hard enough/don't want it bad enough/aren't ready for it yet is the exact same issues I have with organised religion when it comes to guilt and false hope. When I see "the Secret" in the hands of patients in the cancer centre here I want to rip it out of their hands...but I suppose they need something to focus their mind on...and better positivity than despair. It's just the wrong way to go about it if you ask me. I firmly believe in spreading goodness and hope and the power of positivity, but false hope? That is just sinister.

Hmmmm...
I don't know if this all makes a lot of sense...it's a spewed out mish mash of what has been rolling around in my head the past few days...Why? Well, there was a sudden death in the extended family (didn't know them personally but still a surprise) and it got me thinking about this while wondering about people dealing with their grief in their own ways.
What do you out there think about all this? Is the method better than intent? If you're not blindly hoping in falsehood, can a little positive thinking go a long way?
I'm interested to hear your thoughts, as mine are all over the map at the moment...